As Seen On TV, Girls Gone Wild Exposed
Posted by Sergio on 6/10/09 • Categorized as Drunk Tank • 
Stumble It!
As seen on TV, late at night, many times, especially when you’ve struck out after a night of drinking. It’s none other than Girls Gone Wild! We are all aware that these girls bare all, and are the absolute craziest party girls on the planet. Or that’s what they pitch at least…
On a recent summer vacation to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, the great Sergio found himself staring at a billboard promoting a GGW party. Like any curious, good looking guy, I stored it in my mental calendar with every intention of going. What the fuck else is there to do in Myrtle Beach anyways?
The great Sergio arrived on the scene with a close college buddy. And what a scene it was! The “party” took place at a gigantic strip club known as the “Doll House.” Strippers were lined up to welcome Sergio’s entrance, and I thought “Wow, this party’s on!”
To my disappointment, past the front door, the place was a complete meat market. Hicks were lined up as far as the eye could see. I’m talking older, creepier hicks – the extreme white trash variety. Only alcohol could subdue our disbelief at this point. We headed to the nearest beer tub and let our livers know who was in charge.
The “talent” had filmed their “sessions” on the busses and were ready to be even bigger whores. There were 4, borderline 18 year old looking girls that were prepared to dyke it out at the drop of a hat. Lord knows what house broken family GGW solicited them from.
Still double fisting, I was still trying to deal with what a severe let down this had become. Yeah, I wanted a refund. But yeah, I was pretty tanked. And I did get to see some T & A, even if I shared that with half the state of South Carolina.
We couldn’t believe it was nothing like they promoted on TV and left in drunken disgust. We had been duped. Let this be a warning for all future party goers. More importantly, I’d liked to issue another formal warning for my liver. Fuck my liver.
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